No One To Tell Our Story

“How’s Micah?” my father-in-law texts my spouse. He lives in a small suburb in Georgia, sings at church every Sunday, and occasionally wears Hawaiian-print shirts. Every time a trans person makes a splash in mainstream media — Chaz Bono on Dancing With the Stars, Laverne Cox gracing the cover of Time — he checks in, his small way of letting us know he’s totally cool with everything. He is also one of 17 million Americans who saw Caitlyn Jenner come out as transgender on national television.

I haven’t even come out to 17 people, at least not with the whole story.

For my debut piece in The Advocate Magazine, I ruminate over the good and the bad depictions of genderqueer people in the media, and what this lack of representation (or mis-representation) means for non-binary people like me. Of course, there’s a mention to Ruby Rose, Miley Cyrus, and Caitlyn Jenner. So if you missed it, head on over and take a read:

Ruby Rose is Gender Fluid?

There are a million combinations of us, but no one yet to tell our story to our friends and families, to the average American at the breakfast table, in dorm rooms and bedrooms, in grocery aisles and waiting rooms, reading all about it in Vanity Fair.


The New York Times has been running a series called Transgender Today, covering a wide swath of issues faced by the community. They accompanied their articles with an interactive series of editorials where anyone can submit their own story. Mine is about not having a transition template:

There has been no transition template for me to follow; I’ve had to make it up as I go along. My gender does not exist in a society that only has room for male and female. From clothing to vitamins, passports to bathrooms, I don’t see my gender, my identity – me – anywhere.


Last month also saw another published article of mine, a re-print of 5 Myths About Non-Binary Transition over at Everyday Feminism.

And I updated my About page, because nobody likes to read a stale bio. Plus, I get more awesome every year.

micah is awesome

Moving forward, I hope to submit my writing to several other publications in order to reach a wider audience. Not that you guys aren’t wonderful readers! There are just so many people who are dying to hear this information and I wish I knew how to find them all and tell them all they’re not alone or weird (ok maybe just a little) and that it’s all gonna be ok because they’re surrounded by folks like us.

4 responses to “No One To Tell Our Story

  1. Read the piece at the Advocate, and really like it. Recently went to Callen-Lorde clinic in NYC and my choice on the intake form (for trans identity) was Trans-male or Gender non-conforming or Other. I was completely flummoxed about what to put down. I would have expected them to have either an umbrella trans or a non-binary choice other than other.

  2. I’ve been telling people about your blog a lot, as you’ve always been proficient at discussing trans circumstances from a non-binary perspective and there’s an incredible value to that. Thank you!

  3. Reblogged this on Fairy JerBear's Queer World News, Views & More From The City Different – Santa Fe, NM and commented:
    I’m indebted to Micah for their help in my coming out as Agender, through sharing their helpful advice and lived experiences on their blog. I have become so frustrated at the lack of media attention given to non-binary genders, not just in mainstream media but even by agencies claiming to represent LGBTQIA or at least LGBT people. Recently a guide on helping transgender students gave us one paragraph or so and called us “gender expansive!” I am glad Micah’s speaking out and I stand ready and willing to do my part to end what many of us see as non-binary erasure. Thanks Micah!

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